Hi kids! Once again, tonight’s Friday Crap Roundup comes straight outta the 2T.
Now with 10 percent more urban decay!
Σ says she has a full weekend planned for me, so I’d better get cracking on this while I can still get enough sleep. That’s the theory, anyway ….
Getting Banana Bent
Here’s a gem from author and fellow 2T native Travis Hill, who cheerfully informed me he lets his work rest for at least a week before he edits it, not a couple days as previously mentioned here at SB. He then proceeded to threaten to pull my pants down in public and and shout “NERD!!!!” before “running away from the mall cop on his Hov-A-Round.”
I guess he told me a thing or two, huh?
Image credit: Cosmo Spacely
Anyway, my fellow Americans, it turns out we’re not the only country with incredibly stupid politicians after all. You see, national elections are scheduled for 7 September down in Australia. Polls indicate the race overall is a tossup.
Not that it matters to chronically confused anti-Islam activist Stephanie Banister, who’s running for a Queensland seat in the Australian House of Representatives. Regardless of how this pans out, she almost certainly won’t be joining the serious pollies down Canberra way.
You don’t even need to be familiar with Australian politics to see why:
Yes, I can make Australian newscast embeds conform to SB style.
Where to begin? Islam is not a country. Halal and kosher food standards are very similar. The Islamic holy book is the Qur’an, not the “haram” (which is an Islamic term meaning “forbidden,” as in the exact opposite of halal). And as here in the U.S., in Australia labeling food as halal is entirely voluntary.
Oh yeah, Jews don’t follow Jesus, but Muslims do!
Oh, BURN!!!
The Best Argument for Obamacare Yet
But then again, who needs stupid politicians when you can have genuinely mentally unbalanced ones? Meet Jeff Boss, one of New Jersey’s finest citizens. He wants to be your president, or New Jersey’s next governor, or senator, or mayor of New York City (which last I checked isn’t in New Jersey), or whatever. That bit is apparently unimportant.
What is important is that Boss wants you to know the National Security Agency totally “did” the 9/11 attacks, man. And because he knows the truth, they’re trying to kill him and all his supporters. Of course, it’s probably all the paranoid delusions that are slowly doing him in.
Or the asbestos. Definitely the asbestos.
Image credit: Kurt Gardiner
Yeah, nothing like assuring potential supporters they’ll be marked for death by a shadowy, omnipresent government agency as motivation to get them to vote for you. Seems to me if Boss really was a target, the NSA would have done him in years ago, given that his web site clearly announces his home address and that he can be found outside the New York Times Building every Friday afternoon. For a marked man, he sure is easy to find. Here’s hoping he secures the mental health treatment he desperately needs before it’s too late.
Track of the Week
Speaking of which, some people have problems with ADD. Others with OCD. My affliction (among others) is OMD.
And occasionally INXS.
Well, that does it for today’s FCR. Here’s to a — Hrm, odd. Why are there so many black Suburbans parked across the street?